since when, used to...

forgotten since when, i gave up fighting and learn to shut up.
just dont want walk the path that you paved for me,
i just want mine that was created by me, myself.
the pathetic thing is that, i cant even talk to anyone about it.
with almost like half the population outta town/working/mugging/dating/clubbing,
its totally tough to find someone, or worse, anyone, to hang out with.
simply just too busy to even bother with me.
plus, i've been aeroplaned too many times lately.


to be honest, i felt that i have never been a bad friend/sister.
perhaps there are times that people think that im a bad friend/sister,
but nobody in this world is perfect.
i'll always try to be there for those who i do treasure,
being there for them if they need a listening ear, going out with them etc.....
but somehow, i felt that whatever im doing now, its like totally worthless?
not getting the expected treatment that i expect it to be instead, shits is what ive got?


i used to have people who are nice, caring people around me.
they're used to be there.
used to....
since when they left?
since when....